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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-20, 14:43

thanks, sush, maria, romail, zuzana,


good to see you here. hope the story is still fun and enticing. see you soon. posting 6 now.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-20, 14:47

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chapter 6



sing, goddess, of the rage of peleus's son achilles,
the accursed rage that brought great suffering to the achaeans.
~~~ homer, the illiad~~~




she tried to speak, but the fistful of chana in her mouth was an impediment hard to negotiate. she chomped on it furiously, glaring at him all the while.

"what are you doing here?" he spat out.

she wanted to answer but... the chana was too dry and his impatience seething.

"what... what..." he gritted his teeth, "are you...?" he paused. the sun had begun to blaze by now, and a meeting waited. suddenly his eyes changed tone, there was anger and something else.

an iciness entered his gaze, "are you... following me? tell me! tell me, dammit!"

khushi gawked in horror at this bizarre accusation. she opened her mouth thinking of a scathing reply... a fitting jawaab to this rude man, but he was faster, voice adding a peculiar texture in its fury. you could almost touch it, like the husk of a grain, a bitter hard grain. it seemed to graze over her arms...

was there a sickening insult in it?

follow him... who did he think he was... khushi jerked her head in anger, "who do you..."

but he cut her short with an abrupt, guttural question, "who sent you?"

his irises had become sharper and darker somehow, piercing, fixed on her, there was something in them that made her shudder. was this the man who'd saved her? put a towel over her shivering shoulders?

she fought back, "who do you think you are... why should i follow you? in fact, i think you," and she jabbed her finger in the air pointing toward him, "you are following me!"

her eyes flashed with return anger, her plat swung, the pompoms swayed on her sleeves, the gota caught the sun. some chana scattered on the road.

"first you reverse without checking who's behind, then instead of apologising you come hurling insults... accusing me? who do you think you are?"

as she spoke, somewhere between "you are following me" and "who's behind," he felt the claim of an ancient anger. an old searing, white hot rage that had been his for so long he couldn't remember a time when it wasn't there. he could feel its blaze rise and consume, concentrate and burn and fly out all around him, catching the heat of the sun, squeezing the moisture in the air around, evaporating it...

his lips thinned, he lunged forward and brutally grabbed her shoulders fingers digging in. and before she could react he shook her violently, shouting without thought or restraint, "don't you ever... ever say such a thing to me... do you understand...?" his voice rang out, the drone of the car park shattered, people were beginning to notice, something seemed to be on between that man and the woman on her scooter. this was lucknow, near a holy site, people thought twice before barging in.

she looked back at his contorted face twisting with rage, threatening, ugly, too shocked to say anything. what was happening? why was this... this monster behaving like this...? she was heaving, breath short, speechless at this assault.

"DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

her eyes widened. a deafening silence all around.

"i am arnav singh raizada, and girls like you," he paused insinuating things, terrible unspoken things, then carried on through clenched teeth, "don't. mean. a. thing. to. me. how dare you suggest i was following you."

with that, he flung her away with force, turned, and walked back to his car, ready to get in and drive away.

but khushi couldn't let this man get away with  it. she rushed over, and stood before him, barring his way.

"how can you talk to me like that... don't you have any manners... how can you speak to a woman, any woman, like that!!! and that too out here? in front of everybody? and touch her? you touched me..." her voice was rising and breaking at once... "what if anyone touched a woman in your family like that?"

if the moisture had evaporated before, now the air itself wanted to flee.

his arm shot out as he snarled viciously and pushed her hard, full force.

she went flying back, couldn't find her balance and fell on the hard hot asphalt, arms instinctively out to grip the earth, break her fall. dust flew all around, she felt the raw ground on her palms, a sharp pain as something cut into her flesh. ahhh.

tears sprang to her eyes, a retaliation formed in the sheer shock of the moment.

she turned to face her adversary.

he was gone.

***


later that evening in his room, he was getting ready for a business dinner when his eyes fell on a pink plastic purse on the table. his jaw went rigid. he picked it up and flung it away.

khushi kumari gupta sat in front of the colourful happy little statue of her friend, mentor, goddess, devi maiyya and complained about rakshas. what was wrong with him? how can a man be so vile? please make sure, i never have to meet him again, ever.

***

it was day 15.

asr had not shown any sign of return. life support worked round the clock, second every second. the man who strode through life unafraid, undaunted, always looking ahead and beyond; excited by challenge no matter how rough; whose sheer energy and unflinching hard work had grown a whole empire in fashion out of nothing in less than six years, whose employees quaked in his presence yet worked with pride for their company, whose competitors wished the man could be scuttled somehow... that asr lay unmoving on a narrow bed. letting machines run his life.

anjali stood looking at her brother through the glass pane set in the door. this was chhotey, an immense sadness descended. where was his impatience, his constantly moving brain, his gussa. how she missed her little one. born of the same mother, bearers of the same pain, he was always her protector. couldn't she protect him? every year that rakhi. damn. she turned away. this was not good, this was not the time to get maudlin.

payal watched her sister-in-law wondering if di were alright. she had been missing her management classes ever since that afternoon, two weeks is a long time if you're only worrying and fearing the worst. she must chat with di about going back to class soon. give her something to to, it will calm her... of late she'd been hobbling more heavily.

khushi put the odd little red rose in a vase of water and added a pinch of salt. arnav ji always said it was old wives' tale, roses didn't last longer with that, but still. she sat next to him and adjusted the square cushion under his head, and stroked his cheek, just the way he liked her to, letting her thumb play with his cheek bone, now no sign of stubble there, the nurse shaved him clean every morning; his smooth, sparkling skin so sallow under that hospital light. she had to say something quickly, "pata hai, akash jeeja ji was saying that the work on the fall collection is going pretty smoothly. you were supposed to look at those new silhouettes, well he thought he'd wait, but you know... almost july already... they had to choose. but don't worry, jeeja ji is very confident that the collection will be a superhit. actually, he dragged di to ar the other day and made her sit through the selection. i wish i knew a bit more about fashion... i could have helped then... accha, nani ji is fine, she's decided the moment you get back, we are going on a long holiday... just you and me..." khushi smiled slightly at this thought. then a little quietly, "arnav ji, i went to ma's garden today, i know roses don't grow in june, but i don't know, i just thought i should go... i found one rose you know, a red one, it's a bit funny looking, small, petals not that beautifully formed... but," she laid her head on his chest and continued, "i thought it would take care of you." she closed her eyes and just listened.

dhak dhak... dhak dhak. was it his heart or hers?

payal heard the phone first. "di, khushi's phone is ringing!" anjali snapped out of her reverie and reached for the phone. the number showed up as "unknown."

"hello?"

"khushi ji, do you really think arnav had an accident that afternoon?"

the phone was disconnected.

anjali looked at payal and a coldness came in.

***


when he walked in, it was almost 12 midnight, she was waiting for him at the table. he looked tired, drawn, he was taking off his tie and handing the briefcase to hari prakash, when his eyes fell on her, they instantly smouldered.

"why are you up still? you haven't eaten?"

"no... i  thought... this whole week you've been working so hard, coming late... i'd just..."

"stop it, khushi! i'm not a kid. i can handle this big bad world. and i was alive and well and eating and drinking before you came into my life too... so please... just don't do this ridiculous devoted wife act... i hate it. YOU HEAR ME?!"

khushi sat quietly and served him. they ate without exchanging a single word. after he'd finished he left. khushi helped hp clear up and went to their room after almost half an hour.

he was standing by the window in his pyjamas looking out. in profile, his face looked stern and set. the convex of his golden brown iris reflected the light from the pool. it glittered. tears? no. he was just somewhere else... another world where his thoughts took him sometimes, where no one was allowed to enter. not even her. not those corners. his domain.

she walked up behind him and placed her hands on his shoulders. he didn't move. she started to let her hands feel his tense muscles, ever so slowly she began to knead and massage his shoulders, his back, the nape of his neck.

the minutes ticked away.

when she thought it would be one of those nights that she couldn't reach him, he turned suddenly and grasped her in his arms, burying his face in her hair, pushing back the tendrils that insisted on playing on her forehead.

then he lifted her up and carried her to their bed.

he made love to her slowly, ever so slowly, letting each touch, each frisson linger, he wanted to make love to her all night it seemed, and he murmured against her skin as she arched to give him all she had in her heart letting him know in her whole wide world he and only he mattered, "khushi, why are you so sweet to me?" could she ever even begin to explain to him why.




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this chapter owes a lot to a dear friend and someone who just gets asr. she nudged me with a little worry of hers, was asr dark enough? made me think. i hope asr is feeling like we know him to be. rather important to me. the idea of this fiction piece is not to create a new persona for either asr or khushi, it's to see where they go when darkness comes. i hope you had fun reading. please do leave a like or a comment or both. always nice to know if someone enjoyed/got involved in what you wrote. a serious sort of tale this, i hope you like it that way.

one other thing, the story of asr and khushi has always had the richness and mystery of verse in it for me, i am a bit weird about vast love, i have added lines from poems and things to the chapters. makes more the experience i felt.





Last edited by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 23:40; edited 1 time in total

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by A.N.Jell_Zarina on 2013-11-21, 04:59

Nice update...beautiful write up...i m excited to know the journey from that chana-takraar to why she is so swt to hm n alongside waiting hm to wake up soon by her side,by his family's side, by our side...the unknown caller was it shyam? The conspirator? I can only think of him for sth so deadly harmful...so animalistic...
Anjali going mgmt classes n helping in business is very good...these arnav khushi moments of husband n wife,always wanted to see in the show but...
But, its equal great to read them through ur words, thanks for updating dear...

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-21, 05:00

Indi, just finished chapter 5 ... Thank you for the internal story of Prakash bros. I always loved them... There was something about how they rally love d Arnav even though we only saw his gussawala side... He must've been very generous and kind to them... Thanks to your story we get more of their background. Dil khush ...

Dr. verma? Hmm?!?
Fashion for crazy women .... ROFL  the velvet tent she used to wear ... Not even the crazies would wear them... But they were signs of her individualism... And that's why I accepted them...

Rushing to read chapter 6

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-21, 05:29

What??? It wasn't an accident! I knew it giraffe Patel tried to kill him.... Jokes aside... It's making me wonder about life and death.... 15 days... How long does it take for one to know of they will come back or not! I should write a living will... Do you have living will? It's not about money ... It s about your choices regarding last days in case if you are in a comma... I wanted to write that my Hubwa should take me off ventilator ASAP... Maybe I need to do a bit more research as to what is the average length after which one has possibility of coming back... Sorry too gloomy, am I?

BTw, I loved how khushi said you are following me.... That is so so so much like khushi... Why do you think ASR was dark here... Didnt seem too dark... I have been watching IPK 2 ... That character is going to be nasty dark, misogynist... ASR was a hurt character, we could feel his pain in his eyes ... So after initial few months I didn't feel so bad... The initial months I thought this is like a Abuse Cycle and all that blah blah... How quickly my mind was changed...

Loving it Indi... Waiting for 7

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-21, 05:31

Indi the top edit on chapter 6 , is it from the episode when Arnav brings a gift for Lavanya and finds khushi in the kitchen? What a powerful episode... The rage as well as hurt in his eyes... Awesome...

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Maria J on 2013-11-24, 01:20

Indy hug1 

Beautiful post.. 
I can't wait to know who called Khushi?? What made Anjali so angry?? Was it the voice of the person???

Waiting to read more

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by amus5 on 2013-11-24, 14:00

hi came across this FF today and i definitely enjoyed reading all the six chappys...i'm eagerly awaiting for the story to unfold...

ps. i'm still not used to this site so i have a few doubts chap3 and 4 when i read them seemed to be only a single para long is this becos the chappy is only a single paragraph or is it bcos of some network connection on my side.....

thanx for the update....pls continue soon

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-24, 16:46

amus5 wrote:hi came across this FF today and i definitely enjoyed reading all the six chappys...i'm eagerly awaiting for the story to unfold...

ps. i'm still not used to this site so i have a few doubts chap3 and 4 when i read them seemed to be only a single para long is this becos the chappy is only a single paragraph or is it bcos of some network connection on my side.....

thanx for the update....pls continue soon
Amu, welcome to Dhwani.
If you go back to chapter 3 and 4 ... You will be able to read it now. They are visible after you comment atleast once (which you have done) . Yes, this is an awesome FF. Loving it.
Sab

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by amus5 on 2013-11-24, 17:18

Shesherkobita wrote:
amus5 wrote:hi came across this FF today and i definitely enjoyed reading all the six chappys...i'm eagerly awaiting for the story to unfold...

ps. i'm still not used to this site so i have a few doubts chap3 and 4 when i read them seemed to be only a single para long is this becos the chappy is only a single paragraph or is it bcos of some network connection on my side.....

thanx for the update....pls continue soon
Amu, welcome to Dhwani.
If you go back to chapter 3 and 4 ... You will be able to read it now. They are visible after you comment atleast once (which you have done) . Yes, this is an awesome FF. Loving it.
Sab
thanx  :D

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Livewire on 2013-11-24, 22:57

haiyye kitna mast likti hai aap.. Starry Love Starry Love Starry Love Thumbsup

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-25, 01:23

Livewire wrote:haiyye kitna mast likti hai aap.. Starry Love Starry Love Starry Love Thumbsup
Yup... This woman is a genius.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Maria J on 2013-11-27, 09:56

Shesherkobita wrote:
Livewire wrote:haiyye kitna mast likti hai aap.. Starry Love Starry Love Starry Love Thumbsup
Yup... This woman is a genius.
Amen :)

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Zoya161998 on 2013-11-27, 17:14

You won't believe this indi but I read all the chapters twice....and the arhi scenes even slower....
:* emb*: 
Just love love love love it:*love*:

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by vaidya.aparna on 2013-11-28, 23:44

nice update!!!

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 04:49

Shesherkobita wrote:Indi the top edit on chapter 6 , is it from the episode when Arnav brings a gift for Lavanya and finds khushi in the kitchen? What a powerful episode... The rage as well as hurt in his eyes... Awesome...
hi sabi,

you had to do it, right? :) :lol!: i fell in love with this picture of his yesterday when rashmi  was getting ready to post it... and voila it's now your profile shot. how uff aa paarchhi na handsome and hot is he here. and so damn innocent.

i read all the nice things you say about my writing, i am giggly and grateful.

take care.

will post 7 later today. at last some time and energy.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:06

Shesherkobita wrote:What??? It wasn't an accident! I knew it giraffe Patel tried to kill him.... Jokes aside... It's making me wonder about life and death.... 15 days... How long does it take for one to know of they will come back or not! I should write a living will... Do you have living will? It's not about money ... It s about your choices regarding last days in case if you are in a comma... I wanted to write that my Hubwa should take me off ventilator ASAP... Maybe I need to do a bit more research as to what is the average length after which one has possibility of coming back... Sorry too gloomy, am I?

BTw, I loved how khushi said you are following me.... That is so so so much like khushi... Why do you think ASR was dark here... Didnt seem too dark... I have been watching IPK 2 ... That character is going to be nasty dark, misogynist... ASR was a hurt character, we could feel his pain in his eyes ... So after initial few months I didn't feel so bad... The initial months I thought this is like a Abuse Cycle and all that blah blah... How quickly my mind was changed...

Loving it Indi... Waiting for 7
dark asr... he was all light within, but streaks of darkness had shaded his character. was it inherent? was it thanks to circumstances? the funny thing was even when he was nasty, and he was, especially when he released those tapes to the media only to score a win and "show" her who's the boss... even then you wondered about him, you wanted him not to do wrong. that was asr as portrayed by barun, who never let go of the light within even when he was brutal and dragged her up the temple steps.

the current one is indeed a misogynist. and the actor, while a decent sort of chap i am sure, has no idea how to delineate this little monster he must bring to the viewer. oh the jatra quality of it all. i don't watch, but i have heard once in a way or peeped at the screen in an ungaurded moment and it only shocks and hurts till i suddenly start laughing or almost weeping a bit. all because i remember who this whole thing is about.

i have known life to be unpredictable, random, not at all on cue... ever since i have heard of coma, in some melodramatic movie as a child i am sure, or a soap, i have wondered about it. my husband is aware that i do not want to live if it is that. a time limit, i think i have started indicating a time limit of late when i speak of it. he is of the abs opposite persuasion... as long as there is life, you try. you never let go. so i am hoping should it come to such a pass, he will listen to my voice in him and do what i felt was my way. if he doesn't, no amount of my leaving a will or anything will get it done. stubborn gowar gobindo.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:06

vaidya.aparna wrote:nice update!!!
thanks, vidya.aparna

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by Shesherkobita on 2013-11-29, 05:19

indi52 wrote:
Shesherkobita wrote:Indi the top edit on chapter 6 , is it from the episode when Arnav brings a gift for Lavanya and finds khushi in the kitchen? What a powerful episode... The rage as well as hurt in his eyes... Awesome...
hi sabi,

you had to do it, right? :) :lol!: i fell in love with this picture of his yesterday when rashmi  was getting ready to post it... and voila it's now your profile shot. how uff aa paarchhi na handsome and hot is he here. and so damn innocent.

i read all the nice things you say about my writing, i am giggly and grateful.

take care.

will post 7 later today. at last some time and energy.
Indi , i was down about something and meenakshi ( Shegarf) had sent that to me last week to cheer me up... I have had that as my DP for a week now... Everyone asks me where it came from ... And I have NO idea.... Sigh .... He can cheer me up anytime...

I was downloading your episodes analysis for my trip and wala... I find you here! long hug 

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:20

Zoya161998 wrote:You won't believe this indi but I read all the chapters twice....and the arhi scenes even slower....
:* emb*: 
Just love love love love it:*love*:
long hug

aw zoya, thanks so much for saying that. me thrilled.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:29

Shesherkobita wrote:
indi52 wrote:
Shesherkobita wrote:Indi the top edit on chapter 6 , is it from the episode when Arnav brings a gift for Lavanya and finds khushi in the kitchen? What a powerful episode... The rage as well as hurt in his eyes... Awesome...
hi sabi,

you had to do it, right? :) :lol!: i fell in love with this picture of his yesterday when rashmi  was getting ready to post it... and voila it's now your profile shot. how uff aa paarchhi na handsome and hot is he here. and so damn innocent.

i read all the nice things you say about my writing, i am giggly and grateful.

take care.

will post 7 later today. at last some time and energy.
Indi , i was down about something and meenakshi ( Shegarf) had sent that to me last week to cheer me up... I have had that as my DP for a week now... Everyone asks me where it came from ... And I have NO idea.... Sigh .... He can cheer me up anytime...

I was downloading your episodes analysis for my trip and wala... I find you here! long hug 
aww poor baby,

it's from a baat promo... here...

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credit OU on YT

and that picture... no it's from a very early episode... in the car park, when her diya has set the sprinkler off and he storms down all wet, she stands there eating ber... remember?

people keep talking about teh writing of ipk, to me really it was al in the acting, character portrayal and the simmering thing between the two.

can't think of any other actor doing what he did with asr. actually even she was damn good and hot as kkg, till they achhi bahu-ed the choti and mojri out of her.

analysis. hyuk, nice name for my rambling. getting harder, now that we are entering the jungle period where the wicked witch has made sure teh bread crumb trail is lost and we are nver going to find our way back

after being pushed around and plotting a lot you pull off a spectacular wedding. who the h then takes that to a remarriage after that? shouldn't your whole energy be concentrated on showing how this was the real deal? this nafrat shadi with mohabbat in the winds in the chimes in the darkness in the firelight?

ai ai yo.

have fun.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:31

Maria J wrote:Indy hug1 

Beautiful post.. 
I can't wait to know who called Khushi?? What made Anjali so angry?? Was it the voice of the person???

Waiting to read more
hi maria,

glad you like. seven coming up soon... i hope the sttory doesn't disappoint. :)

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:32

amus5 wrote:hi came across this FF today and i definitely enjoyed reading all the six chappys...i'm eagerly awaiting for the story to unfold...

ps. i'm still not used to this site so i have a few doubts chap3 and 4 when i read them seemed to be only a single para long is this becos the chappy is only a single paragraph or is it bcos of some network connection on my side.....

thanx for the update....pls continue soon
amus5,

thanks so so much. hope you were able to read 3 and 4... they were hidden chapters...

will update later today.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:33

Livewire wrote:haiyye kitna mast likti hai aap.. Starry Love Starry Love Starry Love Thumbsup
thank you thank you thank you, livewire. your emoticons make me floaty and happy.

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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

Post by indi52 on 2013-11-29, 05:40

zuzana wrote:Read both he chapters at one go......I absolutely loved how you have sketched kushi...we had missed seeing this from kushi. I remembered how during kidnap track we all had wished to see kushi cry with his shirt on the recliner..*sigh* ..never mind felt at peace to read it in your story.
zuzana,

thank you. sometimes when i write, the characters pretty much tell me what to do, what should come next. that is when the writing is good and natural. i wonder as i watch ipk again on another forum and write two different stories, with basic characters remaining the same, that how come the writers never felt all this. by the time kidnap happened, khushi was a clear strong character, though a bit destroyed because of a host of short sighted reasons, a scene with a shirt or a tie of his... kind of writes itself out. something that belongs to him. they had a dream with a key and payal... nice, the fear and darkness of those moments there. but never that need for asr the man... funny. especially given that she is filmi by nature.

indi52
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Re: arhi ff: without you... chapter 22, page 30, updated 29/4

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